Welcome to Home Shalom!
Welcome to Home Shalom and Shalom Farm. We pray your visit here be blessed. We are learning to walk in the Ways (Torah) of our Father YHWH and follow Y'shua, His Messiah until He returns to "set things straight". We call it a "Messi-Life". Our walk is neither tidy nor perfect, but it is filled with passion, devotion and desire to serve our King. We are learning to be humble servants, and to be good stewards of the things that He has entrusted to us: His Word, our marriage, our children, our family, our community, our health, and our farm. Hitch your horse and stay a while--our door is always open!
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
What is Betrothal? How does it Compare?
Here is a WONDERFUL LINK to a chart which compares Christian Dating, Courtship and Scriptural Betrothal. At the the end of the chart are some questions and answers. It is a wonderful resource that shows the outline given in the culture of Biblical Marriage in the Scriptures.
I would like to point out one thing that may be of concern to my readers. I know it was to me. Do you wonder if betrothal is an ARRANGED MARRIAGE? In all the applications that I have witnessed and as for our house - it is NOT. An Arranged marriage is done soling amongst the father's with no consent to the bride and (often the) groom. That is not what we are promoting here. Here, a young man who is spiritually in step with YHVH (God), he petitions HIM for a bride and waits for the answer (this could happen quickly or take YEARS!). When he is lead to his bride and confirmed in his heart it is whom The Father has for him; he takes this revelation to his own father (and mother). They seek confirmation from YHVH (God) and if they receive it, they bless the son to move forward and petition the maiden's parents. This is done without the young lady's knowledge at first to protect her heart above all. The same process takes place between the young man and maiden's parents. They likely interview the young man intently (or take time to get to know him if they don't already) and seek confirmation for Yah. If this is approved, the parents go to the daughter and bring the request and discussion before her. If she is willing, the same process continues with the maiden and YHVH. She has full rights of refusal - the choice is ultimately hers. She has as much time as she needs. IF she accepts, than maiden's father will contact the young man and they will arrange for them to get together so that he may ask her in person, and a betrothal date is set. The future bride and groom remain in their parents homes until the wedding day. A katubah (marriage contract) is signed at the betrothal and the covenant is made. There are other traditions that usually occur at that ceremony too, it is usually a more private ceremony than the wedding - but not always. Then the bride and groom both prepare for their lives together, in their own ways, until the time of the wedding. The betrothal is a spiritual covenant.
When you have families who have raised their children up in The Scriptures, in Purity, strong family values, in good relationships with one another, and in intimacy with YHVH, of COURSE they hope and pray that their children be married to a spouse with those same values, vision and direction! Divorce is not an option here, so one's marriage choice quickly becomes the most important decision one would make in his or her life. If we are in right standing with our family and Creator - this process is very natural and beautiful. If we have done our job as parents, our children will not view this process as a hindrance, but as a blessing and a gift. They have learned to trust us and Yah (God) knowing we only want the what is best for them and we are willing to go the extra mile to help them. There is trust between the 'children' and parents, trust between children and Yah (God). Through the bound of the The Spirit, trust is also developed between the in-laws as well . The bond that is created in the process between the both families and the new couple is rooted in The Spirit - right from the start. (If Yah be for them who could be against them???) A celebration in the community and the support received to bless this couple is so beautiful. The romance that is cultivated between bride and groom, in between the betrothal and wedding day is Spiritually rooted and so very much more rich and "REAL" than the more shallow effects of dating/courting and mere fleshly attraction. The day of their wedding IS coming and their hearts and minds are set on preparing for their future together. They have full support from parents and siblings through the whole process. It is a beautiful transition of life - unlike any other. The young couple is encouraged, edified and equipped to start their own family. Another generation for The Kingdom is established in love, purity, community, righteousness, kindness, and full support! Its beautiful!
If you have any questions I will do my best to answer them in the comments.