Welcome to Home Shalom!

Welcome to Home Shalom and Shalom Farm. We pray your visit here be blessed. We are learning to walk in the Ways (Torah) of our Father YHWH and follow Y'shua, His Messiah until He returns to "set things straight". We call it a "Messi-Life". Our walk is neither tidy nor perfect, but it is filled with passion, devotion and desire to serve our King. We are learning to be humble servants, and to be good stewards of the things that He has entrusted to us: His Word, our marriage, our children, our family, our community, our health, and our farm. Hitch your horse and stay a while--our door is always open!
Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts

Thursday, May 8, 2014

Yah Willin', If The Creek Don't Rise


I thought I would share a funny story with you that was shared with me, by a dear friend of mine.  (You can see them in our Memorizing Scripture Section - as they have done the Het and Lamed Portions of Psalm 119!) They live on a rural property that requires crossing a river to enter and exit.  This is acually fairly common in our community - as many of us our homesteading.   (Another family in our community had their collection system washed away inthis same storm on their off grid farm!  Last year, We got stuck crossing yet another family's creek trying to enter their property in our 15 passenger van one (cold water) winter day.  Their team of work horses pulled us out that day!)  Anyway, last week we had a series or stormy days in succession.  When you live on a property like that - your freedom and flexibility is subject to the condition of the river that you must cross.  You learn quickly to "step in time" with Creation and your Creator when living this way. We meet at this family's home once a month for Shabbat Fellowship, "Ya willin', if the creek don't rise". The Pappa (Gary) of this family travels to work daily "Yah willin', if the creek don't rise" (but if it does he works from home remotely).  It's a different way of life - but they wouldn't trade it for anything, because they know it is what Yah has called their family to do.

The following is the tale of this last storm, as written my "the momma" (Nancy) as she needed to get in and out of the property during a storm to pick up a very important package that could not wait.  She wrote this in response to friends who were inquiring as to their condition during the storm - to see if they needed anything. (I share it with permission of course!)

We had ordered some baby chicks through the mail and knew that when they came in we'd need to get them from the post office right away and get them under the heat-lamp setup we'd made for them. Well, this morning at 8:00 -- after rain had been pouring for a couple of hours -- I got the call from the postman that the chicks had arrived. Knowing I didn't have much time to get them before the creek might be too high to cross, I grabbed the boys and we all jumped in the van to get the chicks. We had to go across town to the co-op to get some feed and supplies before getting the chicks, and when we got back to Green Acres, the creek was too high for the van to go back across.

After consulting with Gary and deciding that the back-road-route was not an option, the boys and I took to the trail on foot. We wrapped the chick-box in the wool sweater I'd been wearing and charged Jonathan with the safe transport of the chicks. Chris shouldered the fairly heavy block of wood shavings we needed for them, and I toted the bag of chick feed along with my purse (which some of you know is the heaviest item of the lot, mind you.) We all then started on the approx. 1-mile trek that would get us home without having to swim the creek. In a heavy rain that had us drenched not long after we left the car, we walked up the road, down the railroad tracks, across the creek via the railroad bridge, down the steep, muddy railroad embankment, across/through a swollen side creek, and through the woods toward home. We were all quite a site. My denim skirt was hilarious -- like wearing a wet bedspread. I have to say I'm proud of my boys, as they joined in with good spirits.  We trekked along singing songs like, "Detour, There's a Muddy Road Ahead," making a grand adventure of our wet journey. We finally arrived home safely with the chicks, who seemed none the worse for the soggy wear, and we got them all settled in just fine.  They are living in luxury in Granny's bathtub, thanks to her generous and venturesome spirit.  '-)

Meanwhile, Gary had decided he'd better head home while he still had a chance of crossing the creek. Not long before he got home we all saw Shalu (The Family Dog - Pyraneese ) standing on the other side of the creek, unsure of how to get home.  Gary was able to join up with her and take her with him in the truck. He soon found out, though, that all road route options were "out" for his truck as well, and he and Shalu had to take to the trail on foot like we'd had to do. They chose to go a different route, though, hoping to avoid having to cross the swollen side creek the boys and I had had to cross. Little did they know, though, that their choice was even more challenging. Their route took them to the bridge down-road from us that crosses Mill Creek, but that bridge had already begun to be covered with water, and water had flooded around the bridge as well, causing rather deep spots on either side. Long story, but picture Gary -- in his khakis and zero-tread dress shoes -- wading across hip-high water with one hand on Shalu's collar and one hand holding his laptop up high to keep it out of the water. I don't know if Shalu has ever swum before, but if not she has now. Gary said she seemed to know he was there to help, and she trusted his encouragement to swim along with him.

Well, the two of them made it back safe and sound. We've all now been dried, hot-chocolated, and souped and are relishing a cozy afternoon in a warm, dry house. Our "16 head of livestock" (as Gary likes to put it) are snug and happy as well, and we are all thankful for the safety and memorable moments Yah provided for us today. Thanks for checking in on us, Luci. We pray you are all fairing well with the weather. We will look forward to seeing you all soon "Yah willin' and if the creek don't rise!"

Love,

Nancy  

Monday, March 18, 2013

Preparing for Pesach (Passover)

I could not resist this little bit of humor!  I hope it brings a smile to your face and that we do not forget to laugh at ourselves...even as we prepare for the Feasts!

Sometimes we can get a little Mashugana! (Crazy)

 

Friday, February 1, 2013

Purim Puppet Show

This is a "re-post" from Purim two years ago.   We wanted to bring it back to the top in case anyone wanted to use the script and do their own show this year!

We celebrated Purim this past Shabbat with some good friends and put on this puppet show for the kids. We laughed, nashed Hamentash and enjoyed putting on this light hearted puppet show about the story of Esther.

We wrote this play a couple years ago and thought it would be fun to record it to share y'all. Due to a technical error on the video, we lost the opening scene, so I had to add a brief text intro to catch everyone up on the plot. (sorry) It is comedy and we had to improvise on some props (Like Mordichai being paraded around town on a mechanical cat instead of a horse as was written in Scripture!) We did this with no practice and one day of preparation...It runs about 25 minutes total. We hope you enjoy it.

Chag Purim!

Ben and Pamela

If you would like a written copy, here is the Purim Play Script.




Wednesday, May 16, 2012

You Know You're a Homesteader When...............


You know your a homesteader when....you walk into a store (on a warm bright sunny day) with all six children and it is only then, that you notice that they all have rubber boots on (Including the girl's in dresses!) and you are are wearing New Balance sneakers and an apron with your long jean skirt ... and you don't care.  :-)


When did YOU "know you were a homesteader when...."  ???  I would love to hear your comments!





This post was shared at Homestead Barn Hop

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

You Know You're a Homesteader When..................




You know you are homesteader when....your trip to town went later than expected and you find yourself taking the clothes off the line in the pitch dark, while wearing a head lamp.


When did YOU "know you were a homesteader when...."  ???  I would love to hear your comments!


Sunday, August 28, 2011

Momucious the Wise - Hair Cuts


Momucious say,
"She who cuts hair down wind, is itchy all day!"

Momucious the Wise :-)

Monday, June 13, 2011

Laundry on the Fringe


Hanging clothes on the line is my favorite chore. I like to do several loads in the morning when there is still shade over my line, because it is such a cool and pleasant time of spiritual reflection for me. The girls also like to help me and when they do, I enjoy it for different reasons. It moves quickly and they enjoy it and when you work side by side with your children - there is great joy in that! Sweet conversation are had in those moments. My little girls are too small to reach the line, so I put them to work handing me clips from the bag or sorting and handing me laundry from the basket. It is nice to put things on the line in the order of which we put them away. (Like grouping them by bedrooms and towels, etc.) So I will have them get me "all the boys clothes" or all the diapers and they like sorting through the things. The chore becomes a fun scavenger hunt. They also turn things right side out for me and match socks. Our team can make short work for 4 loads of laundry in the 'cool' of the summer morning. ( A good thing in a family of 8 that uses cloth diapers!) Since I found it more productive (and fun) for the girls to sort through the laundry than hand me clips, I just started filling my apron pockets with the clips from the bag for ease. However, today I didn't have apron on or pockets . Me and my 4 year old daughter came up with a fine solution, she would clips a row of them on the bottom of my shirt, and I would easily take them from their as I hung things. We had one more load to go and I let the girls decorate my whole shirt rim with the clips (knowing I would be using them as soon as I pulled the last load out of the washer). They thought that was a real blast. We all laughed and called them my Messianic Keeper at Home Tzit Tzit because it was a "fringe" all along the "four corners" of my garment and there was even "chords of blue". They were fun for all, stylish, obedient to YHVH and practical for my home keeping chores... Win - win - win! :-) (Tee hee)

---------
YHVH spoke to Moses saying, "Speak to the people of Israel, and tell them to make tassels on the corners of their garments throughout their generations, and to put a cord of blue on the tassel of each corner.And it shall be a tassel for you to look at and remember all the commandments of YHVH, to do them, not to follow after your own heart and your own eyes, which you are inclined to whore after.
Numbers 15: 37-39

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Fecal Matters...


I have searched high and low and have yet to find any teachings, “Christian” or “Messianic”, on the deep and important object lesson that is…going to the bathroom. Yes, I am going there. Pamela wanted me to post my thoughts more often, so…between the tasty recipes and helpful hints this blog is widely known for, I am about to broach a topic never preached from any pulpit anywhere at anytime. Feel free to skip to the next post, or at least pre-read this before rushing to print it and read it at the Shabbat table. Here I go.



The other day, I was listening to a “kind-of-Christian” talk radio show, where this subject came up as part of a humorous (O.K. it was hysterical, and no, I won’t link to it) commentary. During the discussion, the hosts said that the Bible had nothing to say on the subject of how and where to go potty, because the “Bible was too classy of a book for that sort of talk”. Oh, how I beg to differ. There are plenty of extremely graphic examples of prophetic words (YHVH’s words expressed through various prophets) that are really shocking (Isaiah 36:12 !), and meant to be so…using terms that would be described as potty language at best. Seriously, from most of our frames of mind, if Mary heard Yeshua say these things, we’d picture her having to wash his mouth out with soap—yet we have to acknowledge that that not only did Mary and Yeshua have to go potty themselves, but that the very natural act was designed into our fleshly bodies…and that YHVH said that “it was good.”

Here is commandment from the Torah on the subject…

“You shall have a place outside the camp, and you shall go out to it. Each of you must have a spade as part of your equipment. Whenever you relieve yourself, dig a hole with the spade and cover the excrement. The camp must be holy, for the LORD your God moves around in your camp to protect you and to defeat your enemies. He must not see any shameful thing among you, or he will turn away from you.” – Deuteronomy 23:12-14

Simple enough. The act of going potty is natural and good, but the byproduct is unholy, shameful, and unclean. It must be buried so the Father Himself doesn’t turn away in disgust. An argument can be made that conveniently bringing our toilets into our own homes, even with modern flushing technology, is not the same thing as walking outside, digging a hole, doing your business in rain or snow, not to mention broad daylight, and burring it yourself with a shovel. Just as humans have done all we can to insulate ourselves from dealing with or even seeing blood…a crucial element of life, we have similarly made this fundamental element of life so mundane that most of us (without various medical problems) don’t even think about it…let alone publicly blog about it.

This complicated biblical procedure seems to me to be an object lesson of the regular recognition and purging of our sins via repentance. Our sin’s are removed from us, and covered…not as a once-and-done thing, but as a part of a regular routine. As a child, in fact, we had to be trained to recognize this unique sensation, and quickly find a grown up to avoid disaster. Now that we are grown ups ourselves, we still feel that sensation--something must be done…sometimes soon, sometimes NOW. Sometimes still it’s too late, and we need to appeal to our Heavenly Father to clean us up, powder our butts, and send us back into the world. We all know some grown ups that are either “full of it”, or even “have a stinky” but do not have the skills or self-awareness to fix their issue. They live a life thinking that their own “stuff” doesn’t stink, and often nobody loves them enough to intervene and show them where the potty is. Or at least hand them a shovel as a hint.

Yeshua actually preached on this topic, but we often get distracted from His point because of the several other life lessons embedded in His language:

“And he called the people to him again and said to them, “Hear me, all of you, and understand: There is nothing outside a person that by going into him can defile him, but the things that come out of a person are what defile him.” And when he had entered the house and left the people, his disciples asked him about the parable. And he said to them, “Then are you also without understanding? Do you not see that whatever goes into a person from outside cannot defile him, since it enters not his heart but his stomach, and is expelled?” (Thus he declared all foods clean.) And he said, “What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person.” Mark 7:14-23

First we have to dismiss the idea that Yeshua’s point was that the dietary laws in The Torah are irrelevant. The line “thus he declared all foods clean” was actual an anonymous scribal notation in the margins of one version of this gospel, that eventually got embedded into the text by some other anonymous copyist. If you are new to this truth and think this is a conspiracy theory, read your own Bible’s notes about why that verse is either in parenthesis, italics, or both. That was far from Yeshua’s point, and far from mine. (Although it ironically shows that there is some man made excrement even in our Scriptures that must be processed and buried outside the camp.)

What started the Messiah’s commentary was the man-made tradition of washing hands before food was eaten. Yeshua was always mindful that His true disciples, then and now, would want to emulate His behavior, and was careful therefore not to endorse these traditions as being at the same level as the Torah commandments. He therefore did not wash his hands (an elaborate ritual) because apparently they were not physically dirty at the time. His parable then was saying that eating food with “ceremonially clean hands” would not stop the formerly tasty food from coming out stinky and nasty. The heart of man is like his stomach. Our hearts produce the nastiest, slinkiest, most detestable things. If we don’t take the time to relieve ourselves in private with The Father, it’s bound to build up and come out publically--either from our mouths (“from the overflow of our hearts the mouth speaks” Luke 6:45) or from the stench that our very lives will eventually produce.

Satan is known as “The Lord of the Flies”. What are flies attracted too? Yep, spiritual poo poo. Pamela and I took a course in “theophostics” years ago, which is a powerful method of getting to the deep source of the trouble in believer’s lives. Theophostics is a fancy way of saying “The light of God”. The idea is to NOT immediately cast out demons when encountered, but to briefly engage them (as Yeshua did) first to find out where the pile of stinky stuff is hidden that is attracting them in the first place. Demons don’t buzz around people who are filled with light, only those with poop hidden in the shadows. Hence Yeshua’s parable…“This is when an evil spirit comes out of a man, it goes through arid places seeking rest and does not find it. Then it says, “I will return to the house I left.” When it arrives, it finds the house swept clean and put in order. Then it goes and takes seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they go in and live there. And the final condition of that man is worse than the first. (Luke 11:24-26) Casting out demons, even cleaning out the obvious poop, will not itself cause the flies to stay away for good.
Eventually that house must be filled with truth (Torah) so that more poop will not accumulate.

The entire sacrificial system and tabernacle that YHVH gave to Moses at Mt. Sinai was sort of a spiritual port-a-potty. Now I know I crossed a line with many of you. Seriously though, The Creator of our bodies, souls and spirits knows that we will need to get this spiritual excrement out of our lives. One could argue that this system was temporary and meant simply as a dramatic object lesson. Eventually all of this “covering” of our forefather’s sins, just created a giant, hidden pile of sin that needed to be “buried outside the camp.” Something more permanent was desperately needed as the “Levitical temps” hired to deal with this human need were not authorized to handle that level of collective clean up.

I personally lived out this object lesson last season during Sukkot. I had just purchased a Coleman camping potty, designed for a person or two…complete with a water reservoir for flushing, and a containment tank to eventually dump. We put this into a small private tent in a common area, and let a few select folks know that we had it, as our sites were pretty far from the public bathrooms. We’ll-- wouldn’t you know it, but those public bathrooms tanks filled up that week. A crew had to come in and excavate, leaving the facilities closed. For a time, my little set up was suddenly busy with activity. Before I knew it, the tank was full, and it was up to little old me to clean it out. For the record, I identify with Ephriam not Levi, but I guess in the end we are all called to be priests. This tank was HEAVY, and sloshy, and even though I was trying to be discrete, everybody I ran into on my mission to dump this thing suddenly wanted to strike up a conversation. Eventually the talk would lead to asking, “hey, what are you holding there?” which generally speaking wrapped up the chit chat pretty quickly.

Anyway, collecting and dumping my own stuff is one thing; collecting and dumping my own tribe’s stuff is doable; dumping the whole CAMP’S stuff is really, really, really, gross. I am tempted to describe it all in detail, with my point being to actually make you gag. Believe me, I think I could do it with just a few choice words. But, I’ll leave that to your own imagination. My mind, while in the confined bathroom stall dumping out this mess, went to our Messiah, as the thought of Him bearing all of mankind’s spiritual excrement. It is amazing how living out these object lessons brings us closer to the mind and heart of Messiah. At that moment, I could identify with Him in a way I never had before. Of course, He took it further--He didn’t just bear our sins…He became our sins! He Himself, suddenly stinky with our wretched refuse, was then cut off from The Father. And then, as the Torah commands, He was buried outside the camp. And yes, the Father did what the Levites could never do… He cleaned off His Son, and allowed Him to come out white as snow and smelling like a rose.

So, next time you go into your private place to do your private thing, remember that indeed the Scriptures do have much to say on this subject. Take the Messiah’s advice, “Everything that is secret will be brought out into the open. Everything that is hidden will be uncovered.” (Luke 12:2) Remember, that we are called to “be Holy like He is Holy”, and that when we walk out of our private place, we too smell like a rose in the nose of our Heavenly Father.

Also, next time you hear someone say "Holy ****", you now have an excuse to repeat this sermonette.

Trivia: The Rabbinic notion of “A Sabbath day’s journey” was originally the estimated distance from the door of the Tabernacle to the nearest area “outside the camp”. Thus, the shortest allowable distance one could walk on Shabbat, specifically to relieve themselves, without doing “unnecessary work.” This concept is fully Jewish tradition and has no actual scriptural basis.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Laughing with me!

I Hope!

I OFTEN make typos and spelling errors in my posts. Sometimes my thoughts are jumbled and my writing is unclear. But this last post - was OVER THE TOP. I think we corrected it, but those of you who are on my email list always get the worst of it! Once in a great while it "self-posts" mid-writing before I am finished or have a chance to proof read things...but that doesn't happen as I often as I just miss stuff. I will see it and pop back on and fix it, but those who get it via email...have received the first mess.

Anyway this last post had me, Ben, Hailey and Elijah ROLLING! I was crying as I was laughing so hard at myself! I am embarrassed and I am trying to be more conscious...please forgive me and bear with me as I hone my writing skills amidst my many tasks as a momma. I am an auditory person...any noise takes my attention and knocks me off focus - that is part of how this happened for this post. All excuses set aside-- I want to thank you who read my blog and for reading between the lines when you need to, while continuing to see my heart and the good in what I try to post. :-)

Ben said," People ask how you get so much done. You should tell them, "I just skip proof reading my posts and it saves me all kinds of time!". He also said I should write it and edit it in Word before I put it in Blogger, to create a buffer between me and the world...but that would take so much more time and formatting issues are still very likely...so even though he is RIGHT...I'm not sure if that is gonna happen. I could only blog when the house is quiet...which might be the most practical and effective solution...but that would certainly cut down on my posts! :-) Ben also said..." Ya know you could just fix it by changing your picture to that of a Chinese person, then people wouldn't think much of it, thinking English is my second language." (No offense is meant to any of my Asian friends!)

So having said all that! Thanks for liking me for who I am...while I will continue to try to keep this in check...I just wanted to tell you in all humility, that I appreciate you who put up with me! :-)

Much Love, p


Thursday, October 21, 2010

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Momucious Say...

Momucious Say..."She who leaves her laptop open is asking for 200 calculaters!"


One of our kittens has been given some freedom in the house (normal an out door kitty) as she heals from a scrap she got in last week. I was in the kitchen when my three littles come running in frantically all yelling, "Cali....the cat...come fast...calculators.....beeping...completer.....combuter (echo) bombuter....kitty cali...keyboard (echo) dddaadda deedord" I rush into the room and there the kitten is standing on my keyboard wondering what all the comotion was! I removed the cat from my keyboard and saw fans and fans and fans of calculaters on my screen...the residual ones still popping up and beeping after she was off. It totalled around 200! I lost count as I was deleting them. Shes back outside now. :-)

Momucious the Wise

Thursday, July 29, 2010

The Holy Spirit and His Unmoveable Torah versus The Flesh

I sooooo want to "preach" on this object lesson....but if this one doesn't speak for itself---you just don't get it.

Ben

Friday, June 4, 2010

Flotilla Choir presents: We Con the World

A friend sent this too me this morning and we were rolling; We just had to share it.

If you aren't old enough to remember "We Are The World", you might google it. :-)

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Leap Frog

My (just) 4 year old son shares what he saw today, with great excitement:

My Son: I saw a cow playing leap frog today!

Mamma: Oh yeah? Where did you see that? (Pappa chuckling in the background.)

My Son: At the Amish farm, when we went to get the milk.

Mamma: Who said it was leap frog; you or daddy?

My Son: Pappa! I asked him what they were doing.




(If you don't get it...think about it for a second.)

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Happy New Year! Shana tova!

Yahshua said his “Yoke was easy and his burden is light”, so why do we create so much trouble for ourselves trying to start the year on the right day? We know YHVH’s months start when the moon is just beginning to reveal itself (or better phrased…as He is revealing it to us). We know that the center of YHVH’s geographical universe is the Land of Israel. We know he wants us to dwell in Unity. So…shouldn’t we all agree that when the moon is first sighted in Israel (or could realistically be sighted with the naked eye if the sky were clear), that would be the ‘head of the year’?

So despite that the moon could have been spotted in California the night before last, it could not have been seen in Israel. Despite that many Hallmark and even ‘Messianic’ calendars had it pre-printed a day early… Despite the fact that Summertown, Tennessee was overcast for full days surrounding the true day…”We calls it as Israel sees it”.

What I love about watching the moon instead of the calendar on the fridge is the object lessons of grace, sovereignty, and community that reveal themselves (or better phrased…as He reveals them to us), when you care enough about HIS day-timer to look. My wife and I have come to understand that YHVH is a master performance artist. He wants us to be deeply impacted by His actions through nature, and our own actions by following His commandments. His people are called to become ‘performance artists’ as well as we attempt to portray His image, acting out His precepts for the world to witness; The ‘nations’ are supposed to be drawn to us, and the Jews are supposed to be jealous of us. Watching the moon and adapting our lives and schedules around His schedule is a perfect example of this peculiar art.

His Sovereignty: “Let there be lights in the firmament of the heavens to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs and seasons and for days and years”. YHVH does not need to see the stars or the moon. Like the Sabbath, they were made for our benefit. How prideful of humanity to ignore these celestial gifts, in favor of our own calendars. Yet, while most of the world seems to be in a hurry to create even more artificial light to block out even the very light from these heavenly bodies (how’s that for Satan’s performance artists), there are those who are using every means necessary to track, anticipate, even “re-live” Biblical events through the lens of astronomy. Obviously the present creation has not yet passed away, so there must be more important events yet to come…all keyed to and revealed through these heavenly signs. The amount of white-out and cross-outs on the calendars of even well-seasoned Messianic believers is a sign of our willingness to adapt to His schedule, not pray He adapts Himself to ours.

His Community: As his set-apart people, we have a responsibility to join together in unity through Him. Since our brethren and sisteren (?) in Israel are the only ones who can confirm the actual sighting of the new moon, we truly rely on them to help the worldwide community set the standard. Like many parts of our restoration to the Torah, without the modern day technology to research the Scriptures, predict the night sky, and instantly connect with one another world wide, we would be stuck relying simply on imperfect tradition, rather than truth. As Daniel prophesied [in those days (these days)],“…many will go back and forth, and knowledge will increase." While on-line communities may lack intimacy, they are instramental to the furthering of His Kingdom.

His Grace: The word for “new” as when used in the term “new” moon is really better translated as “renewed” moon…as the moon itself is obviously very old---as evidenced by all the dust. Likewise the same Hebrew word for new in Jeremiah 31:31 “"The time is coming," declares YHVH, when I will make a new [in other words “renew my”] covenant with the house of Israel and with the house of Judah. It will not be like the covenant I made with their forefathers when I took them by the hand to lead them out of Egypt, because they broke my covenant, though I was a husband to them, declares YHVH.” The new moon serves as a reminder that even though we blow it consistently with our attempts to mirror Yahshua’s flawlessness, our walk with him is a process. Every day we are transformed a little more…sometimes unnoticed to the naked eye. Even if we inadvertently, yet joyfully blow our shofars on the wrong day, if we are watchful we’ll notice around the time of the full moon that we were a little off and have a chance for a date calibration. His mercies are new every morning, but his grace seems to be renewed every two weeks or so.
With all the focus put upon the first of the Biblical year, it’s worth noting that this day is not an official “appointed time”. There is no commandment to rest, celebrate, or otherwise make a big deal about today. However, the 14th day of this month starts the actual cycle of YHVH’s Feasts, and you can’t count to 14 without starting at 1.

This got me thinking about the reasons that mainstream Christianity has completely ignored His Feasts, and replaced them with man-made holidays and pagan celebrations. As a wise man once said, “he who controls the language controls the conversation”. While contemporary Christians are becoming “seeker sensitive” and dumbing-down Biblical principles to enlarge their congregations, we followers of the true Messiah are still trying to reach our Greek-minded brothers with foreign words like “Pesach” and “Shavuot”. Here are some rebranding suggestions to help open the eyes and hearts of our Lawless friends and family.

Note: These are supposed to be light-hearted, so relax…

Try these catchy “Seeker Sensitive” names for YHVH’s Feasts:

Rosh Hoshana
Biblical New Year
Lunatic Calibration Celebration (get it 'luna'tic...)
Confuse a Jew Day

Passover
Remembering The Last Supper
The Worldwide Holy Communion Celebration
Let My People Go! Day
Come Out of Babylon Day

Unleavened Bread
Blood of the Lamb Freedom Festival
Bun Burning Day
Free Matzah!

First Fruits
Resurrection Day
Yes! Finally, Sunday is Biblically Significant Day!

Shavuot
Pentecost (not currently working as a brand - even for Pentacostals)
Replace our Hearts-of-stone With Hearts-of-flesh Day!
Holy Spirit Day!
Restoration Day!
'Did we hit 50 yet?' Day.

Yom Turruah
Post-Tribulation (you’ll see) Rapture Day
What’s that…up in the sky… Day
Blow Like There Ain't No Tommorow (because you might be right) Day

Yom Kippur
Judgment Day (not so happy)
Oh-darn! The-Torah-keepers-were-right Day
Apologize to a Torah-keeper Day

Tabernacles
The Week Long Feast of Yahshua’s Birth
Millennial Reign Preperation Week
‘Dwell With Us’ Camping Week
Refugee Camp Rehearsal Week (maybe not so attractive)

The Last Great Day
The Last Great Day (You can’t change that---it’s too good!)
Creation Restoration! (invitation only)
Lake of Fire Day (no invitation required, BYOB)
Bind Satan Day

Feel free to send us your ideas via comments! That was fun. (Wasn't it?)

Thursday, September 3, 2009

Home School Family

Turn Music off in the upper right had corner to before starting video.

We laughed so hard at this video, we cried! Maybe it's just us?!

The Government Can

Turn off music in the upper right hand corner before you play the video.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Salesman Humor - Lighten Up

If you have ever been in sales...you will find this especially funny. We did...we cried! Having been in sales and around sales for 20 years; we see salesman and their ways coming a mile away. We have all had embarrassing moments...and some were very deserved.... that is why we find this so funny, because we have learned to laugh at ourselves....and yes....our fellow salesman! :-) (Is that wrong???)

p.s. We own a ladder just like this and like it very much!

(We do NOT recommend the search afterward for other You Tube videos linked at the bottom, but can not disable that.)