I am not able to attend my Grandmother's Memorial today, so YHVH woke me at 3am this morning with the burden to express my love and appreciation for one of the most important women who has ever touched my life, Betty June Amones. These words were written for my family to be shared her Memorial. It is wierd posting this about her, knowing she can't read it; she was my biggest blog fan! I miss her already!
This past 10 days have been a roller coaster of emotions, all starting with and coming back again to the death of my Grama. We were very close, although physically far apart. She was a huge influence in my life, and as a mom I have learned so much from her. She is the type of mother and Grandmother that I aspire to be, yet feel like I could never achieve. She was so devoted to her family. I say I was close to her, and I was - but so were many other people! She made each person feel like they were the only one in the universe. She had that special touch and gave us that special attention. She knew just how to smooth things over for you and help you forget your troubles. She was always willing to serve - no matter the task. She made it a point to remember the little things that we liked. She found such joy in her family's happiness and provision. In an age where women are taught to seek identity and satisfaction outside the home, she shined forth like a beacon of light from inside the home. There was a great grounding in that for her family. A sense of stability and security came from her unending commitment and heart of service to her family. She encouraged us in the things we did well and didn't do well. She chose to look right past our faults yet wasn't blind to them. She was a prayer warrior always interceding on our behalf. She would come to our defense in an instant, like a momma bear who would protect her cubs. She spent countless hours tending to the little things that added up and meant so much. She was so sensitive to the needs of her family, whether they were emotional, physical, practical or spiritual - she saw it all - and it all mattered to her. Grama has always provided a covering for us. Now with her gone...it is hard not to feel exposed and venerable.
Grama loved God with all her heart. I believe that it was His love that shined through her onto us all of those years. If I could be half the mother and grandmother that she was, I will have succeeded in life beyond measure. I think of one passage when I think of Grama. She loved like it tells us to in
1 Corinthians 13: 4-8 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.....
I found myself always thinking of Grama as "mine". Sure I would share her...but she was still "mine". As if no one could love her more than me. That shows how selfish I am, because thats just not true. She was all these things I mentioned above and more, but not just to me...she was that way to all her family.
My heart goes out to each one of you as you grieve the loss of your wife, your mother, your grandmother, your sister, and your friend. I also grieve that I can not be there today with you, to hear the stories of Grama, to share in the memorial of her precious life with those whom she impacted so. I hope you will forgive my absence. My heart and prayers are going out to you all and in this time of mourning.
I Love You, Pamela
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